THANK YOU TO ALL WHO CAME TO THE MEETING ON WEDS: FROM NOW ON THE MEETINGS WILL BE ON TUESDAY

HERE ARE SOME NOTES FROM THE MEETING, SO PLEASE SHARE YOUR THOUGHTS, HOPES, GRIPES, WISHES, COMMENTS, DREAMS!!!!!!!

APPEARANCES

Why do we do what we do?

Why do we wear makeup? Do people treat you differently when you’re not wearing makeup?

Is the makeup we wear a part of who we are?

What we say is beautiful is often determined by what other people think - do we feel a lack of control in this?

-do we feel like we have to fit their standards?

-why do we want others’ approval?

-Many people do not deserve our worries

We give other people power hwen we are affected by the negative things we say.

How often do we judge others based on appearances?

Aging is hard in our society for women and women in general judge each other more than men judge each other. why is this?

“he will notice i’m different”

-The more insecure we are, the more we will judge others.

Problem:

-CONFIDENCE ISSUES

-NOT THINKING ABOUT WHY WE DO THINGS

Why do we do things to attract the opposite sex?

-We want people to tell us we look good

-sometimes mostly for a certain guy/girl (even boys do this)

-not unhealthy to make yourself look good (if that’s what you want)

-we feel more confident when we look cute

WOMEN ARE ALLOWED TO THINK MEN ARE SEXY

- women used to not say things like that

-guys dress to impress and also are beginning to compete w/ each other similar to the ways that women do

Competition among women leads to insecurity. In the US we are more conscious and judgmental with body image

Do we judge others as much as we feel they are judging us?

-HOW CAN WE CHANGE IT ALL?

Understanding your emotions so you can free yourself is liberating

Why do we feel inferior? what do you do to combat feeling this?

-Battle the notion that just because something good happens for someone else, it means less of those good things are available for the rest of us. (Just because one couple finds happiness doesn’t mean it will be harder to find someone to date)

-Be genuinely happy when someone succeeds

-We need to support one another - non judgemental

-Get to KNOW people. No negative judgements until you know them

-We underestimate our worth - move past insecurities to get to know others - spend the time!

-Many times people we see as superior or who don’t need us, really need us as friends

-WE CAN BE FRIENDS

-Believe that others are worth our time and learn about them to understand them

-Remember the worth of another human being

-Don’t waste time with people who don’t care about you

- Open your eyes so we can see our similarites

-we can judge some, but give everyone leeway- the benefit of a doubt

- Labeling is not all bad, and labeling to make sense of the world and strive to understand someone is better than merely judging based off those labels. Observe and label in order to understand a person, but wait to see if associated behaviors are actually applicable

-DIFFERENT IS GOOD!

We control the way we come across by the choices we make in the way we dress.

- respect and dress are related.examples: lawyers, missionaries, monks

- we can live and function with generalities

- ultimately we have POWER OVER LABELS

How can we find happiness in ourselves regardless of what people think of us?

Can we find ways to make it so we are not so bothered by others?

Are we the ones demeaning our worth?

Be happy about our good qualities

Have the strength to brush off insults

HOW CAN WE HELP OTHERS?

-offer heartfelt compliments

-don’t wait til someone is in crisis to uplift their spirits

-spread love

-accept compliments, but don’t base your self esteem on them (don’t search for them)

-YOU ARE WORTHY OF BEING LOVED

-Introduce friends with a compliment to others

-Watch people in a caring way

Sometimes we over-analyze the way people look at us or hold themselves. Body language makes up 65% of communication. We may do this in effort to not be hurt and to avoid misunderstandings.

Assume that people are good and thinking good things (benefit of the doubt)

-Strive to have unconditional positive regard for people

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Corrine made a comment about hair:

1 Sex symbol

2 Sets men and women apart

3 people are so sensitive to changes in hair

4 Changes are often associated with emotional changes

5 In some cultures hair is a symbol of sexuality and seductiveness

Is it accurate to say that women who have short hair are automatically one way and should we feel that we are un feminine if we don’t  have hair?

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